One of the greatest gifts one human being can give another is the experience of being listened to by an attentive, nonjudgmental listener. I wonder how many such experiences each of us has had. If you have been listened to actively and nonjudgmentally, you may agree with me that the experience can be transformational!
Why is something that sounds so simple and basic so rare? I imagine you can think of a lot of reasons. Here are a few that occur to me:
- there is a level of noise in our world, whether from outside ourselves or from within our own minds, that makes it difficult to pay attention and really listen to another person
- the pace of life makes it difficult to find time to be quiet and still long enough to listen or to be heard
- most people have no training in active, nonjudgmental listening — a skill that doesn’t always come naturally
- it can be hard to trust sufficiently to share our personal longings, pain, or confusion with another individual
- when we haven’t had the experience of being heard without judgment, we don’t know how to give that gift to someone else.
Listening to others is a gift from us to them, though the experience usually enriches us as well. But what is the greatest gift we can give ourselves? One answer that’s near the top of my list is the gift of understanding and accepting ourselves just as we are. In order to give ourselves that gift, we need to be able to listen to ourselves nonjudgmentally. The resulting self-acceptance becomes the springboard from which we can grow and reach new heights.
Accepting ourselves nonjudgmentally isn’t easy. We are overrun with critical voices and judgments. Finding another human being who can give us the gift of active, nonjudgmental listening can be just what we need to move toward self-acceptance. And who might that person be? Your life coach could be such a person.
Do you have one? Perhaps you have had a coach but didn’t experience that kind of acceptance and nonjudgment. Some coaches have not been trained to understand ADHD. They can mean well but at the same time they can leave you feeling criticized and judged, because they lack the specialized training and understanding that seems to be necessary to help someone with ADHD move toward self-acceptance and the growth it makes possible.
If you are looking for a coach who has lived with ADHD and who has received specialized professional coach training in ADHD, contact us. Either Neil or I would consider it a privilege to support you in your journey toward self-acceptance — a precondition for any growth or progress. We would be happy to talk with you during a Free Exploratory Session. Just call either of us, or email us through the Contact Us link on our website.